為什麼我覺得貓咪是最恐怖的生物?編輯冒死爆出喵星人的真相!據說寫完時已經人間蒸發...

責任編輯: 布魯編 / 分類: 喵喵娛樂

信我這句話:喵星人將要統治世界了!

這個事情的真相很多人類都還被蒙在鼓裡,布魯編身為一個每天沈浸在動物新聞裡的專業間諜,要冒死警告各位,希望叫醒更多同胞要小心你身邊的喵星人!

牠們拉幫結派,數量眾多

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

能飛天

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能潛水

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會飛檐走壁

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而且身懷絕技

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

牠們力大無比

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

精通機械

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

能駕駛戰車

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

會高端技術

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

牠們喜歡時刻監視我們

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利用衛星監控

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組團監控

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會藏在任何角落和你看不到的地方,是一位隱藏極深的間諜

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牠會在深夜暴露出殺手本性,眼神已經深深的出賣了牠

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牠們擁有鎧甲

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

也擁有軟甲

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

所圖甚大

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

已經開始對其他物種下手

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

先解決人類的走狗——汪星人

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

然後撫養汪星人的後代以為己用

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

比如馴養為坐騎

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

或者訓練成軍隊

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

牠們進化出了無可匹敵的力量

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

開始嘗試控制人類的大腦

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

有人類察覺了喵星人的詭計

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

人類馬上開始採取行動,比如用金錢收買牠們

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用語言辱罵他們

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

用美食誘惑他們

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

但是他們縱然被俘虜也不會低下高貴的頭顱

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

反而展開瘋狂的報復!他們圖窮匕見,出其不意給人致命一擊

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

已經能夠御風而行

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

面對汪星人圍攻怡然不懼

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

漠視一切生物,也會詐降迷惑敵人

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

牠們甚至派出了一系列轉基因品種參加戰鬥:喵中王者——獅子喵(別忘了牠們還有老虎豹子等親戚)

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

超長待機——機器喵

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

禍國殃民——美人喵

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

搜集了人類所有的資料,拔掉人類的wifi,讓人類失去理智

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

通過賣萌降低人類戒心

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

早已潛入軍隊打探人類的軍事實力

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

聯繫母星請求支援

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

雄赳赳氣昂昂準備與人類一決勝負

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

很明顯人類戰敗了

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

被邪惡殺手俘虜

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或者被強勢鎮壓

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

已經有人類開始了反抗

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

但仍無法脫離牠們的監控

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

有網友看這篇文章的時候可能已經被發現了

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

小心!小心!小心!你覺得牠們那麼喜歡進廁所真的是好奇你在幹嘛嗎?還是那是一個適合犯案的空間?

寵愛約定 / Via  https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3NTQwODUwMw==&mid=2649472562&idx=2&sn=24908571d509d1e2527a8598030a7800&chksm=876feb2ab018623c0cb3fc68e806b1e6406aca4860cee6762a83a3054114dcb2bc5ddc66e635&scene=27#wechat_redirect

布魯編我是躲在辦公桌下完成這篇文章,而我知道我已經被發現了!如果我因為披露了真相而遭到攻擊,請一定要ㄐㄧasv2frgfsbfgbbbfffffffff

 

本文獲 微信公眾號 @寵愛約定 授權使用,微信號:petspromise

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